Advice To Husbands

Advice to Husbands

Although these are directed at Sikh husbands, for the most part, they can apply to both husband and wife.

1. Respect the opinion of your wife and show you are listening and value her suggestions.
2. Don’t be moody. Your tone and attitude matter sometimes more than the words.
3. Smile. You don’t need a reason, just smile.
4. Avoid anger and avoid speaking roughly or rudely.
5. Give surprises and gifts.
6. Love is broken with harsh words and strengthened by sweet ones.
7. Pay compliments to your wife. Express your appreciation to her.
8. Break the routine every once in a while.
10. Help in the house.
11. Pay attention in raising the children. It is your responsibility too.
12. Don’t leave the small problems unsolved or ignored. They will grow otherwise.
13. Eat meals together.
14. Keep her informed about your plans. Consult her on major decisions (personal and family). Do not surprise her on these matters
15. Don’t walk away and leave home during arguments. Try to resolve the issue before ending the day.
16. Do not resort to silence when unhappy.
17. Don’t dwell on past mistakes or fights. Forgive and forget.
18. Never threaten divorce or separation. Never say you regret having entered the marriage.
19. Don’t admonish and criticize your wife in public. Don’t tolerate or participate in her insult (joking or otherwise).
20. In front of her family and friends, show her respect and show you value her.
21. Don’t reveal your marriage’s or your wife’s secrets and private details to anyone.
24. Don’t be inflexible. Look for compromise.
25. Understand you are not always right. Be willing to apologize.
26. Physically be delicate with her. Do not be physically aggressive or imposing.
27. Respect your wife’s family and encourage her to do the same.
28. Show that you are interested in what she is interested in (hobbies, pass times, etc.)
29. Don’t seek marital advice openly. If you wish to have advice, take it only from someone you trust, and is capable of advising properly.
30. Show concern for her health and do not ever put it at risk.
31. Be there for her during difficult times and be sure she knows you are there to listen to her.
32. Share your own feelings with her regularly.
33. Be delicate when dealing with her weaknesses. Do not press the issue.
34. Have good intentions in your heart for your wife. Wish the best for her because her success is yours as well.
35. Speak politely and show courtesy to your wife. Open doors, help carry heavy objects, arrange for her to sit or rest when she is tired.
36. If your wife says or does something minor that you did not like, ignore it.
37. During pregnancy and during her menstruation period, be sure to be even more considerate and patient than usual.
38. Never try to impose upon her how great you are due to your education or job, etc. Do not belittle her level of education or job.
39. Don’t say or try to show that your earning income or bringing food is a favor to her. Recognize that only G-d is the giver.
40. Never betray your wife’s trust through words or deeds. All other women are mothers, sisters or daughters.
41. Don’t give her the opportunity to think that your love or regard for her is any less than her love and regard for you.