Coping Statements for Anxiety

·                                 Fighting this doesn’t help – so I’ll just relax and breathe deeply and let it float away.

·                                 This feeling isn’t comfortable, but I can handle it.

·                                 By relaxing through these feelings I learn to face my fears.

·                                 I can feel anxious and still deal with this situation.

·                                 This is not a real emergency. I can slow down and think about what I need to do.

·                                 This feeling will go away.²

·                                 By staying present and focused on my task my anxiety will decrease.

·                                 These are just thoughts – not reality.

·                                 Anxiety won’t hurt me.

·                                 Feeling tense is natural. It tells me it’s time to use coping strategies.

·                                 Things are not as bad I am making them out to be.

·                                 Don’t discount the positives.³

Coping Statements for Fear - Preparing for Stress/Anxiety

Overwhelming anxiety and stress is not only unpleasant; it can also reduce your performance (think test anxiety!) Coping statements can calm you down and keep you at your best.

Researchers at West Virginia University found that coping statement training helped speech-anxious subjects reduce their public speaking anxiety – and the effects lasted beyond the training period.⁴

·                                 I’ve done this before so I can do it again.

·                                 I’ll be glad I did it when this is over.⁵

·                                 I’ll feel better when I am actually in the situation.

·                                 I’ll just do the best I can.

·                                 By facing my fears I can overcome them.

·                                 Worry doesn’t help.

·                                 Whatever happens, happens. I can handle it.

Coping Statements for Feeling Overwhelmed

·                                 Stay focused on the present. What do I need to do right now?

·                                 It will soon be over.

·                                 It’s not the worst thing that could happen.

·                                 Step by step until it’s over.

·                                 I don’t need to eliminate stress, just keep it under control.

·                                 Once I label my stress from 1 to 10 I can watch it go down.

·                                 Take a breath.

 Coping Statements for Panic

·                                 This isn’t dangerous.

·                                 I will just let my body pass through this.

·                                 I have survived panic attacks before and I will survive this as well.

·                                 Nothing serious is going to happen.

·                                 This will pass.⁸

Coping Statements for Anger Management

·                                 It’s not worth getting mad about.

·                                 I won’t take this personally.

·                                 I am in charge not my anger.

·                                 I am going to breathe slowly until I know what to do.¹¹

·                                 Getting angry isn’t going to help.

·                                 I can handle this and stay in control.

·                                 Remember to breathe. Remember to breathe.

·                                 People aren’t against me – they’re for themselves.¹²

Read more: Using Coping Cards and Coping Statements to Improve Mental Health

You will have bad days. Expect and accept that. Such is worry, and such is life. On those off days, resolve to put yourself on ignore. Sometimes the best thing we can do is to get out of our own way. Our minds can make small issues huge, and make a drama out of every little thing when our moods are out of whack. When you're having a bad day, think pamper. Be good to yourself; allow for a treat or two, and put your thoughts on hold. Tomorrow will find you feeling better and grateful.

Stress is part of life, and learning how to manage it is part of successful life. With time and practice, your life will flow with ease.

See, what we usually think when we have emotions that become overwhelming is that we wish we weren’t feeling this again – we feel powerless, not over the emotion itself, but over having it in the first place! Well, this just isn’t going to happen ALL the time. We also think that because we are feeling something, it must correlate with reality. If I don’t FEEL like I love my partner today, then I must not. This just isn’t true. When we talk about this intellectually it sounds silly right? But it is how many people interpret their emotions. Your emotions do not have to mean something. They might have something to say to you and you might obtain some meaning from them, but what happens is that the meaning that many people attribute to their emotions gets too over generalized. That is what happens when we get lost in it and cannot see the forest for the trees.

Observing is sensing or experiencing without describing or labeling the experience. It is noticing or attending to something. The benefit of this practice is that the mind becomes quiet. Eventually, you will be able to observe things without a running commentary of a talkative mind. Preoccupation, rumination, distraction, and daydreaming are all examples of a talkative mind.

The ability to step back from what is happening in the moment creates psychological space. This separation allows you to not get caught in or react to your experience. Without the psychological space, your reactions are automatic. Shame, guilt, anxiety, and depression often collapse your ability to create psychological space and cause automatic reactions (acting the way you feel). Experiencing the moment without getting caught or reacting is a way to extinguish automatic responses. Psychological space creates room for mental flexibility and freedom of choice.

Self-effectiveness depends upon your ability to test the reality of your thoughts.

Crisis Survival Strategies

Skills for tolerating painful events and emotions when you cannot make things better right away.

DISTRACT with "Wise Mind ACCEPTS:'
 Activities (keep busy)
 Contributing (get your mind off yourself)
 Comparisons (could be worse...)
 Emotions (do something that makes you feel differently)
 Pushing away (block out thoughts and feelings)
 Thoughts (distracting thoughts)
 Senses (be aware of your senses)


SELF-SOOTHE the FIVE SENSES
 Vision
Hearing
Smell
Taste
Touch


IMPROVE THE MOMENT

 Imagine (better times, better things, success)
 Meaning (find one useful thing about the situation for you)
 Prayer (find some quiet place inside of you)
 Relaxation (quiet your body)
 One thing at a time (just this moment)
 Vacation (go someplace in your mind, or take a time out)
 Encouragement (tell yourself it will be OK)

PROS AND CONS
Crisis Survival Strategies

Strength Building Self-Statements

1. What’s the worst that can happen? And based on my experience, and NOT on my emotions, how likely is that to happen?

2. Feelings are sometimes painful, but are time-limited.

3. It will get easier each time I practice.

4. My success is measured by taking skillful action, not by whether I was anxious when I did it.

5. I’m not going to let a lapse get in my way. I’m going to continue making progress towards my goal.

6. Feeling I can’t do it is NOT the same as not being able to do it. Stick to the plan.

7. Good job—I’m staying in the situation, even though it’s hard.

8. I’m going to make it.

9. It’s a sign of strength to ask for help in an effective way.

10. Knowing when to ask for coaching is a skill in itself.

11. I am a unique person, and I have unique reactions. Only I can determine how I SHOULD feel in any given situation.

12. My feelings are not right or wrong, they just simply ARE.

13. A feeling of certainty is not the same as the truth.

14. My painful emotions happen for a reason and are an important source of  information and direction for me.

15. Urges are a natural part of emotions and of being human. Having an urge (even a strong urge) does not mean that I have to DO anything at all.

Ways You Can See Your Thoughts Differently

Ways You Can See Your Thoughts Differently

1. Just watch them come in and leave, without feeling that you have to follow them.

2. View your thought as a mental event rather than a fact. It may be true that this event often occurs with other feelings. It is tempting to think of it as being true. But it is still up to you to decide whether it is true and how you want to deal with it.

3. Write your thoughts down on paper. This lets you see them in a way that is less emotional and
overwhelming. Also, the pause between having the thought and writing it down can give you a moment to
reflect on its meaning.

4. Ask yourself the following questions:

-Did this thought just pop into my head automatically?
-Does it fit with the facts of the situation?
-Is there something about it that I can question?
-How would I have thought about it at another time, in another mood?
-Are there alternatives?

5. For particularly difficult thoughts, it may help to take another look at them intentionally, in a balanced, open state of mind, as part of your sitting practice: Let your “wise mind” give its perspective.

From Segal, Williams, Teasdale (2002) based in part on Fennell, in Hawton et al. 1989.

In DBT mindfulness helps the client to let go of the mental struggle of shutting out unwanted thoughts and emotions. Mindfulness helps the client to experience more fully the present moment while focusing less on painful experiences from the past or frightening possibilities in the future. Mindfulness will also give clients tools to overcome habitual, negative judgments about themselves and others.