Friday, December 29, 2023

Darkness Summary

 



Based on our discussion today, as we reflected on the origins of your seasonal trauma triggers and worked to establish empowering new associations with this time of year, you have gained some pivotal insights that will greatly advance your recovery. These insights include:


1.    Identifying the "perfect storm" of multiple traumatic losses that occurred during the same time period, such as the loss of attachment figures, developmental milestones, and challenges with emotional regulation. These experiences left deep imprints and shaped unhelpful survival response patterns that are now associated with the darkening seasons.


2.    Recognizing the significant role played by your first collision with terrifying yet misunderstood panic attacks. This experience reinforced a sense of helplessness and became a key element tied to the transitional fall-winter timeline when the initial overwhelm occurred without proper support.


3.    Strategically recalling factual details during distressing emotional flashbacks to provide concrete reminders of past safety and stability during crisis events. By doing so, you create markers in your implicit body memory that signal that those moments passed and that you are not trapped in a timeless state of terror.


4.    Committing to replacing previous tendencies toward isolation and withdrawal during trigger windows with new grounding rituals that affirm your agency, connection, and embodiment. Engaging in activities such as walks outdoors or gym visits satisfies your brain's need to establish updated and healthier associations.


5.    Allowing yourself to experience and express grief over the innocence that was lost prematurely due to overwhelming experiences. Sharing vulnerably with safe and supportive individuals has enabled you to cultivate greater self-compassion regarding the traumas that were outside of your control.


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